The button not seen

Today was my first polling experience. I was very excited for this day, not because I wanted to vote but because of the one day off from my work. A day off from work is such a big relief. The campaigning was on full swing by all the political parties, rallies all over the state, media coverage on its peak. Everyone is expecting a turnaround this time.  

Every Indian citizen gets this opportunity only once in five years. As a responsible and aware citizen I went to the polling station (a school, nearby) to cast my vote at around 3 O’ Clock and as expected there was no long queue at the polling center. I had no idea whom to vote. The concerned persons verified my voter identity card and then I went inside the classroom still wondering whom to give my one precious vote. There were lots of red colored buttons on the Electronic Voting Machine with different symbols ranging from ‘Cycle’ to ‘Elephant’. But I was looking for a button with no symbol. I didn’t wanted to vote anyone in the list. I wanted to vote no one. I wanted to reject them all. I have heard that Our Constitution provides us a ‘right to reject’. But I couldn’t find that button.

I took a minute or two and finally decided not to cast my vote at all. I got out of the polling booth without even voting and came to home. Rule 49 (o) of The Conduct of Election Rules, 1961 provides us a right to reject. But the government has not notified the same till date for the obvious reasons. My decision not to vote, may not be a right one, may be it was not in conformity with the true democratic spirit, maybe I did not dispense with my duty as a responsible citizen. But what is the way the way out when you don’t find any candidate worthy of your precious vote. I am waiting for the button not seen.

उड़ने दो पतंग

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तो  बाकी है आसमान 

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तोह बाकी है उड़ान 

दूसरी पतंगों का डर  नहीं मुझे 

बस हवाओं में लेहेराना है 

तारों से भी दूर है मंजिल मेरी 

अपना रास्ता बनाते हुए आगे निकल जाना  है            

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तो बाकी है आसमान 

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तोह बाकी है उड़ान

मज़बूत और तेज़ है मांजा मेरा 

किसी से भी लड़ जाऊँगा 

अँधेरे का भी डर नहीं 

रात में भी उड़ जाऊँगा 

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तो बाकी है आसमान 

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तोह बाकी है उड़ान

कट भी गया तो कोई दुख नहीं 

फिज़ा  के साथ कही और पहुच जाऊँगा 

जिसको भी मिला उसी के साथ उड़ जाऊँगा  

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तो बाकी है आसमान ............

उड़ने दो पतंग अभी तो बाकी है उड़ान......

View from the top of my building

Sometimes one incident changes the course of life, for me it was about 15 years ago. I was at home doing nothing so I decided to go at the top of my building to get a nice view of the city. I was all alone there. From there, I could see the whole city, it was a slum at one side and the high rise towers on the other. But it was the slum side which attracted me more, I kept on staring that side and a weird thought of spending a whole day in a slum struck my mind. I told my parents about my decision to live in a slum for a day and to my surprise they didn’t opposed it.

It was about six in the evening; I left home and moved to that slum. I was going to live their life for 24 hours. As soon as I went through those shabby shanties, which they called home, children playing with the tyre and tubes came to me hoping for a chocolate but I had nothing with me, not even a single penny. I also started playing with them but soon realized that it was getting darker. I also needed a shanty for spending the whole night. I went deeper into the slum. It was almost the meal time for the slum dwellers and now I was one of them. I saw a woman making dough for the chapattis, all the flies were also a part of the meal making process. I couldn’t even look at that. A family allowed me to spend a night in their shack. It was one big family of as many as 4 girls and 3 boys. I could not even eat that food, but it was a full dinner for them. There were electric wires but no electricity. Empty stomach, it was time to sleep with the good company of mosquitos, and some frightening sound. In the morning, to my anticipation there was sanitation system. I attended the nature’s call in natural environment. I was one of them.


Well, to my relief some children did went to school and for the rest, I was their teacher for the day. When all the children came we had lunch together. Now, I was feeling one of them. The day passed without any happening. My 24 hours were completed. I went home. There was delicious food but I could not eat it, there were no mosquitos but still I could not sleep. Today, 15 years after, here I stand, chief minister of ‘Uttam Pradesh’, youngest CM of any state, right in front that place but there is no slum. All are resettled in a better place. The state has the highest GDP. There is development all over. 

Par aaj bhi dil mein yehi sawaal hai…..have I made it large.

Too strong or too weak

A few years back, my friend, Aman, committed suicide because he failed in his class 12 examinations. Every year there are hundreds of students who commit suicide because of the same reasons. And there are thousands of people all over the world who commit suicide because of one or the other reason. To me, even the thought of committing suicide is formidable.

Just recalling Aman’s act made me think that was he too strong at that time or too weak. It can only be either of the two possibilities. Committing suicide is not like doing some mischievous acts, it is one of the gravest sins in mankind.  A person needs to be too strong to do such an act. He must be too determined, too courageous and too strong in committing this gravest sin. And the next possibility is that he is too weak, too coward and too helpless face the reality or the failure of life.

But these thoughts led me to a more confused state of mind. If a person is strong enough to kill him, if he has that much courage to put an end to his life then why can’t he fight against all the odds and start all over again, why can’t he give a fresh breathe of air, a new hope of sunlight to his life.

If a person is so weak that he cannot overcome the shadow of failure then from where does that courage to commit the suicide comes. It means that the Courage which comes at the spur of the moment, over shadows the optimistic ray of hopes. This could be because the negative vibes are much stronger than the positive ones. But if those strong feelings minus the negativity can be stretched even a bit more, it can easily be converted into the positivity of life or if that weakness can be further weakened then the person would not be able to commit that sin and then as we all know life finds its own ways.

But, whatever the solution be, this vicious circle of too strong or too weak goes on and on.

वो पुरानी डायरी

उन किताबों में एक पुरानी डायरी भी थी 

थोड़ी धूल जमी  थी   उस  पर, 

खुद  हाथो  से   साफ़  किया 

पन्ने  कुछ  पीले  पढ़  चुके  थे  उसके  

और  आँखों  से  एक  आंसू  छलक  कर   गिर  पड़ा  उस  पर   

उन किताबों में एक पुरानी डायरी भी थी

कुछ  खट्टी, कुछ  मीठी 

यादें  बसी  थी  उसमे, 

गुलाब  का  एक  फूल  भी  था   उसमे   

पत्तियाँ  सूख  के टूट  चुकी  थी  उसकी  

पर  खुशबू   अभी  भी  बाकी  थी उसमे  

उन किताबों में एक पुरानी डायरी भी थी

कुछ  सालो  पहले  खो  गई  थी  मेरी  डायरी, 

आज  मिली  तो  याद  आ  गई  

उन स्याही के दिनों  की 

और  लौट  आई  जीने  की  आस  

पर  आज  न  वो  स्याही  है  न  ही  वो  दिन 

मैंने  खुद  को  खो  दिया  है  कही 

उन किताबों में एक पुरानी डायरी भी थी.........